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borrowed mind

by canis lupus

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1.
endowed 03:20
i lay in my bed trying to sleep realized this stopped being my home and i cling to you while you're moving on. your lyrics cling to my walls they're starting to look so small as i'm sleeping still, quietly in the snow the cold takes me like a kiss on my sleeve, i'm along for the ride hoping for things to change. though i'm a second thought at least i'm a thought at all. it's the only thing that keeps me alive unimpressive and underwhelming looking at the glass on the wall tired about what's looking back i fucking hate myself, think about something else wow long til i change don't want to miss a thing i don't plan on leaving but i feel the road thinning below my feet as i leave the ground. god help me endow a better head on my shoulders and a way to make the world stop spinning
2.
tinfoil 03:41
suppress your thoughts of what's come, the bad will get better work out the issues of your mind, things will get better lie beside me here tonight, ignore the bad weather pretend your on a cloud, the world is below you imagine this is all yours, or at least for a moment all the trees and things that grow, do so to impress you the strongest ones I know, will cry on occasion as the little kids dance and run, and play to the music the grass is never green, to those who can't see. the kids who grew up alone, don't know the difference resolve the conflicts of your life, its worth it to worry about the things going bump in the night they're only memories painting this world in black and white, cuz colors are useless if your eyes are shaded grey, from the cuts and the bruises momma told you to be strong, but her words are useless those images were sewn in your mind like a patch to my arm those bleeding lines placed in your mind, came from a knife you stole from your brothers room, its a shame to be like this why has age done this to you you, just play with your legos the night is young and so are you, so talk with your night light who needed friends anyways, you've still got the voices
3.
forevermore 03:22
listen to the trees they sigh i lie awake by your side i watched you sleeping last night the seasons change in time the redwoods dot the sky i'm still scared of flying but with you forever's fine. last night i felt the earth move a dried up lake now in bloom i dedicate this to you the trees all sing at night i hold you close this time we watched the world unwind and with you forever's fine. we flooded empty rivers traced the outline drawn on your shirt sharing air in the back of a truck you stayed when you could have left and i'm still scared to death but most days i think of you and forever doesn't seem so bad you smile i feel my heart melt the joyous pain that i felt against my better judgment fire ignites the sky line i had a dream where i died but you were there by my side so i'll dream of you forevermore
4.
ghostboy 03:02
he picks up where he left off and he thinks about all those times specific emotions about nothing in particular this time he cries himself to sleep on a wednesday but by friday he’s fine theres nothing wrong with the taste of his salad but today its all gone he walks alone for the most part it seems but tomorrow he’ll go chasing dogs and cats for the most part he’ll never come home lost for words while he’s thinking of verbs the articulations all wrong talking circles at a stranger but they don’t know the song afraid to sleep cuz the monsters under my bed still need to eat close the door dear the ghosts are still here they’re trapped in my head
5.
laughing 03:25
6.
thankyou 04:54
all those times you talked with me kinda makes me think that it was all a dream but i can't recall waking up in the harshness of dawn and all of this going away you were the first kids to talk to me about all the things that went on at this new school always there by my feeble side making sure that i never threw myself to the dogs now i watch as we grow up and start to think how did i get such wonderful friends waking up on a sunday feeling so shitty but never more glad that i stayed finished making some music playing at schools and leaving this fucking world behind taking walks through the trails at home talking about life and the things that surly should come and you would talk to me about all those things no one ever would say the ones deep in my brain Always walked me to classes thanks for taking a chance on the new kid who has no friends never thought i would wind up with someone who'd stand up and fight for my growing voice i love you all with the deepest roots that my heart gives you and i never want this to end starting pits at school dances how fucking dandy nothing will ever be like it was watching rain fall in portland thinking of all those wonderful times spent back in my town sit around waiting for your call when you get home Washington's to far from us all watching the movie you made us crying and begging that we will never forget those time your song floating in my head haunting my memories reminding me of all that i cared
7.
the forest 02:59
did you hear that my son i think your mother is, i think your mother is singing through the trees she didn't mean what she said, she didn’t mean what she said no harm was done i think it's time to come home, i think its time to come home and rest the forest will be there in the morning there's no need to protest she didn't mean what she said, she didn’t mean what she means only the best can't you hear her weep can’t you hear her cry all the times we've spent i think it's time we went, i think its time we went your a child, a lost soul all this energy you have spent don't it deter you from doing what you meant, from don't worry your head you mother loves you so so climb into bed rest your precious head
8.
there's something in the basement i can hear it clawing at things i haven't thought about in years. carving away at the things i love the most it's tied to the radiator i can hear it breathing as it's crawling up and down the wall. the voices are clearer when brightness is dimmer why can't you hear me i'm screaming in here. i've been trapped drowning in my past waiting for my reprieve. i stand amid wood and wire hoping to piece this all back together. jesus help me i hear the voices they’re getting close. how long the dark played in my brain and how long my thoughts have antagonized my pains . i sit with a borrowed mind hoping one day i find my own.

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not good, but okay.

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released September 12, 2015

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canis lupus Portland, Oregon

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